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did it hurt?

Taylor Meehan

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yes it filled my throat with molten rock, hardening & re-melting with every rush of smoke to my head it itched like a tattoo eight days out, like a twice-ripped-open scab that’s finally learned how to hold on, it itched like recovery itches & it was deafening & suffocating but somehow I could still sing Shania & Florence knowing every word was true 

it hurt like you did this you broke me & here you are, stranger, three feet away it hurt like give me another hit so i can stand to sit here next to you it hurt like what the fuck it hurt like i missed you it hurt like where have you been it hurt like you’re not the person i used to love like that 

it hurt like except

you are 

it hurt like it killed me (and then it didn’t) it hurt like you’re still the only thing that makes words pour out of me like ink from a needle it hurt like you cured my writer’s block, goddamn it it hurt like seeing your friend shake on the tattoo table it hurt like i want coffee but nothing is right it hurt like being drunk and regretting it it hurt like being hungover & lied to it hurt like broken promises it hurt like see you in three weeks (and then i didn’t) 

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